dec 13th, 2025

hai everynyan! im on my break rn (im cramming for finals). im super stressed. i nevr have to do homework over the weekend.
yesterday i went to see fnaf 2 in theatres with my friends and it was SOOO good!!!! im rly sad that michael was so ugly. the theatre was fun bc it was js teenagers so we were like making farting noises when it was quiet and like screaming late after a jumpscare. it was like the minecraft movie part 2 lmao!

dec 8th, 2025

I feel like ever since I came back from my Thanksgiving trip, everything has been so weird. Marshall doesn’t feel the same, my room doesn’t feel the same, I don’t feel the same, and I’ve been doing worse in school. I’ve even been thinking about hurting myself. I don’t know what is going on because I’ve been so happy for so long and I’m sad now. I have everything in the world. I don’t have a reason to be upset. I failed my biology test today that I’ve been studying for for three days. I feel like sometimes no matter how hard I try, I’m always gonna fail.

dec 1st, 2025

i can feel everything all at once.
its in my ears, in my eye cavities. i cannot see. i do not have eyes. i have black string twisting and twisting pulling out the guts. i rub hot coal into my empty eye sockets. burn. i feel dead. but i feel alive when im with you. am i a ghost? am i just pretending? am i really happy? or is this just another fascade? there are fish swimming through the place where my chest is supposed to be. they stab me as they swim through. i love fish, so why does it hurt me so greatly? why cant i live without myself hurting myself?

one bad thing happens and my entire day is ruined. i am the opposite of resiliant. i am NOT strong, nor brave. i am a coward. i avoid everything. i cheat my way through my life. i talk about my mental health and trauma as if its a joke. why do i do that? theres something so irreversably wrong with me. i dont understand how anyone could stand being near the stench of my lies and dishonesty. i believed i was a good person but now im not sure i was meant to be. i want to be good. but the thorns have wrapped around my limbs once again. they pull me. i can feel my arms began to stretch in to different directions. the thorns dig and scrape as they pull. i probably look pretty like this. how messed up is that? i like to hurt. im so fucking fucked up.

nov 17th, 2025

guess who got a home run... this girl did!!! WOOHOO!!! ive been doing very good in school recently! the only thing is that coding is starting to take up a lot of my time and its becoming a bit too much...i might need a break. i love yall!!!!